"Sir! Would you care to try a Stupid Pill?"
"Well I don't know. I, ah..."
"I'll bet you're already taking them!"
I can't imagine what it must be like working in a department store this time of year. I really am not going to go on railing against humanity. All I really mean a simple quiet evening is not a bad thing every now and then.
My sister is in the middle of buying a house. She's understandably a little on the grumpy side thanks to the bank and the state. I called to say hello and she quickly informed me that she was not planning any Christmas eve or day dinner. She was too busy and tired to do anything but to "stop by if you want to." Long story short, my other sister showed up so along with my two sisters and brother in law we ended up ordering Chinese food and did quite a bit of laughing and a bit of drinking. Of course it isn't real Chinese food. It is Americanized. I don't think Chinese people are eating Crab Rangoon. And I was hard pressed to find much crab meat in it. But none of that mattered, it was wonderful to have a no pressure evening.
Then of course we come to work. The chain I work for changes it's sale cycle/ad change every Friday. On this day we receive new signs and shelf tags. Shelf tags are the little tags on the front of a grocery shelf telling you what the item is, a scan bar, and a bunch of numbers. Prices change, tags change. It's Friday and I'm out checking shelf tags. I come across this one. Has anybody ever heard of this particular item?
You have to wonder what BAFF is and why does it have to be squishy? Is that a sign of ripeness? Maybe we northerners prefer our baff squishy where as the southerners prefer a firmer baff? Is it a cheese or some kind of cleaning item? "Look how easy the Squishy Baff cleans up that disgusting mess!"
We do know that buying one will cost you $15.99. You could be buying something to eat or something to clean your toilet with. I'm just trying to stay in the holiday spirit here.
Despite all the lunacy above, my actual holiday was quite nice. On Christmas night I went to my lady friend's house. I feel silly saying "my girlfriend" at my age. Of course that could change once I get off my high horse. There. I'm down.
She lives next door. It's very convenient! We had a lovely meal along with her daughters. It was all a very pleasant night. It began on a humorous note. Arlene lives in a rather large "3 decker" or 3 family house. It's about 110 years old. It's been in her family for a good chunk of that time. There are 5 good sized rooms on each floor. Arlene lives on the 3rd floor. She has a little dog. A "min pin" or miniature doberman pincer. It's a nice little dog but it's a bundle neurosis . Any little thing can set off a yipping frenzy. I do find it amazing that he can tell tell the difference between when I stand up to go into another room, from when I stand up to go home. I'm guessing Bruno has abandonment issues.
So I walk up the front porch stairs and press the door bell for the third floor. Keep in mind that the people living on the second floor have two dogs and the people on the first floor have one as well.
"YIP! YIP YIP YIP..."! etc. What is he thinking?
"Someones leaving! Someones coming! Where are you going?! Don't leave me! I saw a leaf! Where's my food!
This racket sets the two dogs on the second floor off. They're mid sized dogs with howls and deeper barks! And then on cue dog #3 goes off! All this racket over nothing. It was funny though.
I am back to work and it is not pretty. I could retire next year at this time and might just do that. I would like to take some time off in the next few months and hopefully I will be able to. One thing I am definitely going to do is head back to Martha's Vineyard in May or June. I am so lucky to have access to a place that's not all that far away, yet is surrounded by ocean and pretty peaceful (in the off seasons anyway) yet not all that different than where I live. It's good for the soul and also considerably cheaper in the off season.
I do have another incident to report but I think I'll save it for the next blog which should be in a couple of days. All I'll say about it is that it happened on December 12 at a friends birthday party in a restaurant. It was all free. The food and the wine flowed...
I'm outta here.